Pride & Pressed Prune Juice

Pride & Pressed Prune Juice

 
Ebenezer Grunter
(for that was his name)
had an evil habit
but was without shame

He’d let rip in public and
shock the society
he saw not the least
impropriety

People would gag
and almost choke
when in the presence
of this dirty old bloke

They suggested that he
should alter his diet
but old Ebenezer
was loth to try it

For he ate prunes
for breakfast lunch and dinner
and denied fiercely
that he was a sinner

But sin or not
he fairly stunk
even more so
when he had drunk

Pressed prune juice
by the flagon
his passing of wind
was akin to a dragon

And he would not refrain
when the children cried
he swore to continue
as a matter of pride

But as with many tales
this one ends badly
and the old man died
suddenly and sadly

He choked on a prune stone
and was laid to rest
the good folk mourned
the passing of a pest

Do not speak ill
of the newly departed
for his only crime
was to have farted

Iain

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